kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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