Duck Duck Cougar?
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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