I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
