you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
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Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
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Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
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