Don't you send me to vm
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Randomize
