Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
