and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
