my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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