Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize