Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
