I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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