I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize