How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
