you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
