this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
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