it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
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He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
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In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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