Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
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