oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
