Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
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