He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
