So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
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I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
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Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
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