Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It was like giving head to a cactus.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
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