dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
