To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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