the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
Randomize
