I feel great
I just peed on a car
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
