you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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