maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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