porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize