he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
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He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
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Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?