i can't believe i had my finger in that
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
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They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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