Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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