i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
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