She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
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There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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