if we break up, who will get the dealer?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
