My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
