I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
you're hired as official boob wrangler
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
