Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
