I CAN MOONWALK!
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize