I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
