Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
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