So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
My doctor was like "I think adderall is a great choice. It'll definitely benefit you and you say you've taken it before so you'll be fine!" \nAnd I was like "yeah bro, totally"
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Randomize
