he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
You were so hammed, you asked your buddy in Economics to plot a demand curve for Parmesan Cheese.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
