My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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