she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
