my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
