So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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