I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Randomize
