Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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