I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
Randomize
