your room smells of hookers.
And success
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
