so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
I'm passing your future prison.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
